Quotes from White Collar Episode "Taking Account"

Season 3, Episode 7 Air Date: July 19, 2011

Sara: Back up there, sticky fingers.

Caffrey: 3-1-8-9.
Sara: That's impossible. I picked a random number.
Caffrey: Well, there's no such thing as random. Your subconscious is always back there, working.
Sara: Or you saw the reflection in the camera guard.
Caffrey: Or I might have done that.

Sara: My apartment is fully under construction, so until I pull my next commission check...
Caffrey: You could stay with me. You know, till this is cleared up.
Sara: Uh...at June's? You sure that's a good idea?
Caffrey: Well, it's not the Four Seasons, but... I can bring you food on a little cart.
Sara: Okay.
Burke: I remember when Elizabeth moved in.
Caffrey: No. No. This is temporary.
Burke: Yep. So was El.

Mozzie: Oh. Sara. Hello. Welcome.
Sara: I hope we didn't interrupt you.
Mozzie: I was, um...looking at porn.
Sara: At the dining room table? Of someone else's home?
Mozzie: Well, you live your life. And I see now you're living in mine. I wasn't informed you were moving in.
Sara: She's not moving in. You heard about the Manhattan Mutual hack?
Mozzie: Of course. It was a masterstroke. Whoever's behind that shredded paper mask is a bona fide genius.
Caffrey: Thank you, Moz. Sara got cleaned out. She's staying here until the money's recovered.
Mozzie: Oh, so we have a roommate.
Sara: We? I was unaware it was a package deal.
Caffrey: It's...
Sara: I'm gonna put some things away. You two can chat.
Caffrey: Porn? Really?
Mozzie: I panicked.

Mozzie: Uh, Sara, Neal and I were discussing your predicament. And I would like to offer my assistance.
Sara: So you want to get rid of me.
Mozzie: Po-tay-to, po-tah-to. Let's do it.

Caffrey: You know, helping you dress seems so counterproductive.

Sara: But you're keeping your hands off my banker's box.
Caffrey: Oh, yeah?
Sara: Mm-hmm.
Caffrey: We'll see about that.
Sara: You're trouble.

Burke: This sounds like the world's most expensive date.
Diana: You think Duponte has a partner with expensive tastes?
Burke: I think I have a partner with expensive tastes.

Burke: Oh, so you were gonna call me eventually?
Caffrey: Oh. Peter, there is an explanation for all this.
Burke: You thought you'd spend the money to draw the Vulture out of hiding.
Caffrey: I love how we're always on the same page.
Burke: Same page? We're not reading the same book. We're not even in the same library.
Caffrey: Okay, I can see that you're mad.
Burke: Damn right I'm mad. You robbed a bank.
Caffrey: Vulture robbed a bank. We simply...
Burke: Robbed a different bank? Nice dress. What were you thinking, Sara?
Sara: Look, it was either that or we sit on our hands until this guy slipped up.

Burke: You — you're coming with me. There's a lot of missing money out there, and someone's going to prison for it. You're gonna help me make sure that it's the Vulture and not the two of you.

Burke: There are checks and balances — a notion that goes beyond Neal's comprehension.
Caffrey: No, I understand checks. It's just the balances that I struggle with.

Caffrey: I keep my heists in the third dimension.

Elizabeth: Why don't I give Mozzie a call?
Burke: You have his number?
Elizabeth: We chat.
Burke: They chat?
Caffrey: I wouldn't be too concerned. Mozzie is very good with boundaries.

Elizabeth: I see you boys are getting along.
Caffrey: Like Burr and Hamilton.
Elizabeth: Fellow revolutionaries?
Caffrey: Pistols at noon.

Computer Voice: Send out the handsome one. (Neal moves to open his door.) The one in the back.
Mozzie: Consider that a lesson in modesty.

Sally: Get off me, you corpocratic sycophant!
Diana: She bit me.
Sally: You work for a government who apportions more weight to lobbyists than to constituents. Who's worse?
Burke: Jones, you have anything?
Jones: We found the roost, but our shooter is long gone.
Burke: All right, collect all the evidence and bring it back with ballistics.
Sally: You can keep your little CSI kit in your pants. The person you're looking for is Kurt Brauer.
Burke: How do you know?
Sally: Because I helped him build the virus that drained Manhattan Mutual.

Sally: They're only toys in your hands.
Mozzie: In my client's hands, those are WMDs.
Caffrey: For her legal counsel, you're not helping her case.
Mozzie: Strike that from the record.
Burke: So, why can't we find a photo of Brauer?
Sally: He's off the grid. I've looked, too. I can't tell you what he looks like, but I can tell you what I know.
Mozzie: As long as my client leaves uncharged and unmolested!
Burke: Don't touch the WMDs. And I'm not calling you Vulture.
Sally: Sally.
Mozzie: Short for "Salieri"?
Sally: It is now.

Sally: What do you see out that window? I see a thousand C.E.O.s collecting undisclosed bonuses even as they lay off half their workforce.

Mozzie: Of course, they're putting RFID chips in food packaging now, so they can track you through your Cap'n Crunch. We should replace your, uh, cereal boxes with plastic container— Uh, foil... It's not just good for hats.

Caffrey: These past few days — They remind me of the Palazzo Sasso. They've been perfect.
Sara: You're really hung up on that hotel.
Caffrey: It wasn't just the hotel. It was a time in my life when I had everything I was looking for — freedom, excitement, comfort, and the right people to share it with.
Sara: You think this might be another one of those moments?
Caffrey: What if I told you that we could keep living like this?
Sara: What? Rich beyond measure, unaccountable to anyone or anything, not a care in the world?
Caffrey: Is that a yes?
Sara: No, it's a daydream.
Caffrey: Maybe daydreams can come true.
Sara: And that is why I like you. Because you dreamed all of this up. And it really has been a hell of a lot of fun.
Caffrey: But?
Sara: But we didn't earn it, Neal. People like me don't get gold-plated guitars. Not legally. Hey, I don't cross any line I can't come back from.
Caffrey: And I'd never ask you to.
Sara: Okay. Well, maybe this is our Palazzo Sasso, then. But I think you're forgetting a very important part of that story. The Palazzo Sasso didn't last.

Burke: How are you and Sara doing?
Caffrey: Well, you know, there are always growing pains.
Burke: She's taken over the closet?
Caffrey: Are you in a full-fledged garment war with Elizabeth?
Caffrey: I mean, first she wants you to iron your own shirts, and now she's taking over the closet?
Burke: We're not talking about El and me.
Caffrey: Sara did complain about my anklet.
Burke: Ooh?
Caffrey: I toss in my sleep, and she bruises easily.
Burke: How about if I take off your anklet?
Caffrey: That'd be great.
Burke: Then we'll see if Sara prefers conjugal visits. 'Cause you'd be in prison.
Caffrey: As a rule of thumb, you shouldn't have to explain your jokes.

Mozzie: Uh, hello?
Neal: Moz?
Mozzie: Neal, this isn't a great time.
Caffrey: Yeah, well, you've got the FBI on the line. We need to talk to your new client.
Mozzie: Please call my office during normal business hours to set an appointment.
Caffrey: Can you find Sally or not?
Mozzie: Hang on. Do you see my glasses?
Sally: They're right in front of you.
Caffrey: Wait. Are they...
Burke: I think...they are.
Mozzie: Are these your socks?
Sally: That one is mine.
Diana: I will never unhear that.

Brauer: I'm a hero.
Burke: You're a thief.
Brauer: Not underground. Not to my people.
Burke: I've actually spent a lot of time with your people.
Caffrey: More than he'd like.
Burke: You robbed a bank, and you tried to kill Vulture. You don't have any friends left, above or below ground.
Jones: And I bet this has everything we need to prove you built the virus.
Burke: Just don't plug it in at the office.

Sally: Tell the Suit he can thank me with Department of Justice access codes.
Caffrey: Not gonna happen.
Mozzie: We'll settle for Department of Agriculture. You know how hormone-injected chickens are —

Caffrey: Another "W" for Caffrey and Burke.
Burke: Complete with late-inning heroics — Just the way I like it.
Caffrey: What, you don't appreciate a nice, relaxing blowout?
Burke: Oh, I'll take a win however I can get it. There is something about the bottom of the ninth.
Caffrey: Yeah, bases loaded, full count, two outs.And we knock it out of the park.
Burke: Plus, you always make sure my job is a challenge.
Caffrey: Ah, come on.
Burke: Mm. I sent some probies to your apartment to collect your millionaire fantasy camp. There'll be a lot of happy people to know they're getting their money back.
Caffrey: Yeah, and a lot of unhappy store clerks when you return everything we bought with Brauer's score.
Burke: You worried about that or the fact that you have to give it up?
Caffrey: Can it be both?
Burke: Nope. You knew you couldn't keep those things forever.
Caffrey: Do you remember when I was staying at the Palazzo Sasso in Ravello and you had Europol closing in?
Burke: No. You were in Ravello?
Caffrey: Right after the Corsica heist.
Burke: Ohh. I had no idea you were there. I had Europol leak that we were getting close so you'd keep moving.
Caffrey: You were bluffing.
Burke: Yeah.
Caffrey: So I could have stayed there.
Burke: Yeah. I guess you could have.

Caffrey: We got Brauer.
Sara: I heard. It's pretty amazing. When will you be home?
Caffrey: Are we a "when will you be home" couple?
Sara: No. I... I'm asking because when you said that we could keep living like this, what did you mean, Neal?
Caffrey: Nothing. You know, it's like you said — I was...daydreaming.
Sara: Really? That's all?
Caffrey: That's really all. Come on. Smile. You're gonna get your money back. We'll celebrate tonight.

Caffrey: What you got there?
Mozzie: Oh. Vulture's number. And I didn't even have to circumvent a middlebox.
Caffrey: You got yourself a girlfriend.
Mozzie: Neither I nor she would ever thrust such a crude epithet upon ourselves.

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